What Do I Know?
With parenthood looming just around the corner, (along with enforced bedrest, which I hafta say I’m not *good* at) I’ve been allowed a lot of time to reflect on life, and things, and stuff. I’m on the verge of bringing a whole brand-new person into this world, and apart from being a bit daunting, the thought has definitely made me take stock of just what it is, exactly, that I know.
I guess at a lot of things, suppose others….some things manifest themselves perfectly clearly, others….not so much. And if my little one grows up anything like me, “why” will be a popular question.
With that in mind, armed with my limited knowledge, I’ve compiled the following lists:
THINGS I KNOW:
*Your life will be much happier if you’re never too busy to finish listening to your favorite song before you get out of your car.
* Singing is way more fun if no one is listening.
* The last one of anything tastes the best.
* You have to grow older, but you never have to grow up. (call that one a personal philosophy)
* Genuine smiles are contagious.
* In public restrooms, all bets are off. (I recently washed my hands next to a woman who turned her faucet all the way on….and promptly walked away without turning it off. It was all I could do not to tackle her on her way out.)
* True friends are worth their weight in gold…and can be rarer than rare gems.
* All creatures great and small need love and respect. (spiders don’t count. I kid, I kid)
* Once in awhile, it behooves you to do something completely out of character.
* Not everyone uses words like ‘behoove’ in day-to-day speech. And that’s OK.
* Life is a lot more fun when your inner child is more of an outer child.
* Your mom is a giant dork and some people dig that about her. Those that don’t are no fun.
* You get more out of giving than taking.
* Working hard for something is much more rewarding than instant gratification.
* When the shower is running, you will most likely hear singing.
* You don’t always have to answer the phone.
* You can learn more from a dolphin than you can from most people.
* Strive to have a good hard laugh every day…where you almost lose bladder control. It’s good for the soul. (plus it releases endorphins like crazy)
* Everyone needs more laughs and more hugs. The ones who think they don’t, need ’em even more.
* Things that aren’t good for you tend to taste better.
and last, but certainly not least:
* There will always be two arms open here for you whenever you need them.
now, the second list will ostensibly never end, but I will try to encapsulate a few for demonstrative purposes, in the list I call:
Things I don’t know:
* How they get the tootsie roll part into the Tootsie Pop
* Where most people got their driver’s licenses
* Why some people think they are better than others
* Why you will always break a nail, get a zit, bust a shoe, or get a runner in your stockings when you’re running late
* Why there are full-grown women who will turn on a faucet all the way in a public restroom and then walk away without turning it off
* Why it’s frowned upon to tackle such people and make them have manners
* Why we can’t bottle and sell that Zen-like calm that some people have
* Why grown ups don’t play outside more often
* Why people continue to exit through clearly marked emergency exits with big red letters that say ALARM WILL SOUND (maybe this is just in retail)
* Why some people just like to complain
* Why thunderstorms are so cool
* How I got into horses pretty much from the time I discovered what they were, despite being the only one in my family to do so
* How people can swear off love forever….until the next time
* Why there isn’t a mandatory age to outgrow hiccups
* How songs can transport us
* Why scents can trigger the strongest memories in us
* How people can *not* wash their hands after using the bathroom…cuz that’s just gross
* How 80s music got to be Old School…wasn’t that just a couple years ago?
* Why nature unfailingly cheers me up…..which leads me to….
* Why my mom sends me the ‘first leaf of fall’ from Michigan every year in a card….and why I save every one
* Why some people will leave four drops of milk in the carton in the fridge and call it good
* Why we get so much junk mail when everyone is so worried about the environment and recycling. (for example: I have not had Sprint for my home phone for over a year….since I cancelled it in January of 2005. Every month SINCE then….I kid you not….I have gotten a ‘statement’ from Sprint, telling me I have a CREDIT of $5.82. I don’t know at what point this becomes harassment)
* How I can listen to the same song 100 times in a row and never get tired of it
* How I can exaggerate since it’s more likely about 30 times. Only so many hours in a day.
* Why I will confidently raise my voice to idiot drivers who can’t hear me anyway, but I refuse to flip anyone off (apart from that ONE time….but he totally deserved it)
* What it is about musicians
* What it is about pregnancy…that makes all and sundry suddenly touch my belly without so much as a “may I?” or “do you mind?” I’m starting to feel like a lucky Buddha.
and finally, (since it’s about time I thought about getting a snack for me and my charge, here)
* I don’t know what kind of a parent I will be, but I know it will be one full of unconditional love and support. I may be an old fart, but I hope to count myself among the “cool” parents.
And to all who may read this….feel free to add your own to either list. It’ll be fun to get more input!